Poking Fun at Bush

Here's a fun little satire of the "accomplishments" of the Bush Administration. Read the whole thing at Jon Swift's website. Here are the highlights without the mischievous details:

• After Hurricane Katrina President Bush kept our cities safe.
• After the October 2008 stock market correction there have been no Great Depressions.
• After Iraq and Afghanistan took a turn for the worse, President Bush kept us from losing any wars.
• After the District Attorney firing scandal, the outing of Valerie Plame and other scandals, President Bush restored integrity to government.
• After divisive elections President Bush united our country.
• After Abu Ghraib, President Bush reaffirmed America's adherence to the Geneva Conventions and against torture.
• After 9/11 President Bush kept America safe from terrorist attacks on American soil.

I for one am like totally impressed by Bush's ability to save America from another Katrina. Like, Jon Swift really nails this one...

In the three years and a half years since Hurricane Katrina not a single American city has been destroyed or partially destroyed. There are more than 10,000 cities in the United States and because of George Bush every single one of them, except for New Orleans, is still largely intact. Of course, no one could have predicted Hurricane Katrina, and if President Clinton had not left us so woefully unprepared, New Orleans would probably be in a lot better shape than it is now. But since Katrina, there have been numerous hurricanes, tornadoes, floods, blizzards, fires and earthquakes and none of them has gotten out of hand and wiped out an entire city because of the disaster preparedness policies President Bush put in place. For national security reasons we may not know until records are declassified how many other potential disasters, like epidemics or nuclear power plant meltdowns or alien invasions, were averted because of the work that government agencies did behind the scenes. Unfortunately, Presidents don't usually get credit for all the disasters that don't happen. But I think we should congratulate the President for doing a heckuva job on keeping America safe in the years since Katrina.

I dunno... seems to me that Jon Swift is setting the bar awfully high. Who can expect Obama to come anywhere near these kind of awesome "achievements"??? I'm already getting nostalgic about Bush.

I'm going to miss they way Bush so ineptly kept sticking his thumb into the eye of the world opinion and so determinedly kept beating down ordinary Americans so that he could richly reward his people, the gazillionaire plutocrats. You know, those swank people from Wall Street who raped and pillaged freely for eight years. Ah... it is sad to see the "good old days" come to an end. It is going to be so dismal to see the little people work and actually get rewarded. I predict it will go to their head. They will think that should be allowed to vote in the next election. Oh My God! We have to nip that in the bud.

Those "little people" will probably get all uppity and think they deserve pay raises for the efforts to get America back on the rails. But Thank God! There is Jeb Bush in the waiting just offstage to come in and save America with a new round of big tax cuts for the super-rich and, or course, a new round of bailouts for all the big corporations. Yes... I can see light at the end of the proverbial tunnel. Just four years of misery until 2012 when the sweaty little underclass can be put back in the closet and we -- the real Masters of the Universe -- can pop the cork on champagne and party on with a new round of Lifestyles of the Rich and Famous... four more years! four more years!